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Cinematic Disasters: Congo

A review by Brooks Rich

Sometimes we have to explore films that don't work for one reason or the other. It gets a little dull constantly talking about films that are classics or generally considered “good” films. It's sometimes fun to just look at a film that fell flat on its face and bombed. This Sunday we'll take a look at the Star Trek film that nearly derailed the franchises it was so bad.  But today we have one of my favorite bad movies of the '90s. This film is a complete failure in every sense of the word. Ignore the fact that it actually had a good return at the box office – leave that to the power of the box office in the '90s and that it's based on a Michael Crichton novel. The story is insane and absurd and the events that happen are barely held together by the very thin plot. But at least we do know that Amy is a good gorilla. Also, Laura Linney asks another character if he's serving that ape a martini?! There's a joke about a leech being on a man's penis. A laser cuts a gorilla in half. Gorillas jump into lava. Yeah. Welcome to Congo.

So why do I consider this film a cinematic disaster? Well… it' reputation. Congo is not remembered as a cinematic achievement. It's actually looked on as a joke. Nowadays it's probably best known as the talking gorilla movie where the gorilla wants a tickle. I watched it recently to cover it for the inaugural Cinematic Disasters and I was amazed about how absurd it is. Even beyond the talking gorilla. Yes yes, Amy is a good gorilla. But some of the lines here are ridiculous. Laura Linney asking if the gorilla was served a martini, mentioned above. Someone contact PETA because they drug the shit out of this gorilla throughout the whole movie. The legendary Delroy Lindo utters the classic line, “stop eating my sesame cake.” Oh, Congo.

One dude who should not be faulted for Congo is cinematographer Allen Daviau, who is awesome.You should all look him up. He shoots the shit out of this film and yeah, Congo does look great cinematically. It fails in every other area, but Daviau is a professional and did a great job. Respect, Mr. Daviau.

The cast should be praised for not phoning it in. They take the movie seriously. Laura Linney is trying. God knows, she's trying. Ernie Hudson is being cool  because it's impossible for Ernie Hudson to not be cool. Tim Curry has a thankless job to make his ridiculous character somewhat entertaining. Of course he does because he's Tim goddamn Curry  but my God, what is that accent, Tim? But a good cast will only get people into the seats, though I imagine Crichton was the name that got people to the theaters. Hey, remember Jurassic Park? Yeah, it's that dude. But this is gorillas instead of dinosaurs and instead of a master like Spielberg, it's Arachnophobia director Frank Marshall, who is also a legendary Hollywood producer, falling flat on his face.

I don't care how much money this movie made. The Transformers films clean up at the box office and those are a joke. Look at the Twilight franchise. Congo became a laughing stock. Keep that in mind as we cover more cinematic disasters. Some of the best films of all time were box office disasters. Money does not always mean quality. Now deep down does a part of me enjoy Congo? Oh,absolutely. It's so bad, but in the best way. It's a laugh out loud comedy but for all the wrong reasons. I will laugh every time Amy says she's a good gorilla. It's so absurdly awful. So if you are one of those film watchers who like something so bad it's good, check out Congo.

Real quick, check out that poster tagline down below. Is that not the most '90s thing ever?


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