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John Carpenter month: The Thing

A breakdown by the four writers

It just wouldn't be fair for one of us to get to cover The Thing and exclude the others. So here's a quick breakdown by all four of us, each of us sharing our own take on The Thing. 

Brooks

This is the best movie ever made about paranoia and what paranoia can do to a group of people. We see the breakdown of this group of me, unable to trust one another and unable to go anywhere to escape. The Thing, like Alien before it, solves a major problem in most horror movies, where the characters should just get the fuck out of there. There's nowhere to go in The Thing. Outside of the compound is the frozen hellish landscape of Antarctica, much like outside of the ship in Alien there's only death in the cold vacuum of space. Escaping from the monster in The Thing will only guarantee a slow death out in the dark. Carpenter was a very pessimistic director at times but this is his bleakest film by far. 

Forrest

An interesting thing about John Carpenter Month here is that all of us love “The Thing”, Carpenter's 1982 sci-fi/horror classic, to the point we're doing joint coverage of it as opposed to anyone of us doing it ourselves. It was the first major horror film I ever watched, and it scared the tar out of my pre-teen self. In the years since my appreciation for it has only grown. I now count it as my favorite horror film, period. John Carpenter crafted a true masterpiece of horror, one that went sadly unappreciated when it released, but has since become a major cult classic. No discussion of 80's horror is complete without Carpenter's magnum opus entering the discussion, it almost always places among the apex of the genre with well-deserved reverence. . The practical effects are top-notch, with some of the most visceral and memorable body horror ever put to film, and the formless monster, an alien growing and changing as it assimilates more and more people to try and survive, is one of the scariest monsters ever. It could be anyone with its ability to absorb and mimic any life form it wants. The sheer paranoia, suspense, and tension this creates permeate the entire film wonderfully. The cast are all great, with the standouts of course being Kurt Russel, Keith David and Wilford Brimley. One of my favorite things is that these people are smart, they make good decisions and the monster is also pitting its cunning against them, hiding for long stretches of the film and even planting evidence to keep that paranoia going. All of this is enhanced by Ennio Morricone's amazing musical score, subtly pulsing through scenes and flaring up at just the right times. It's all paced perfectly, keeping tensions high but not overstaying its welcome, ending in one of the bleakest ways imaginable. There are very few films I think come close to being perfect, but this is one of them. 

Chris

 Everyone else is gonna write some nice stuff about The Thing being quintessential horror. They’re absolutely right. It’s one of the greatest ever made. Instead of doing that I’m just gonna talk about THAT scene. 

What the fuck? WHAT. THE. fuck Mr. Carpenter - what?!

I’m sitting here trying to think….I’ve seen a lot of horror movies and some good body horror. The Fly is pretty goddamn nuts, but because there’s a logic to it I guess it’s not as scary? Still horrifying though.

But Jesus fucking Christ, John Carpenter.
I think The Thing contains THE most WTF scene of all time.

Here is my reaction to THAT scene the first time I saw it:


-“Oh that’s not good, somebody do CPR!”
-“OH HELL NO WTF?!”
-“OH MY GOD HIS ARMS!”
-“AHHHH!”
-“WHAT?! AHHHHH!”
-“BURN IT! BURN IT!”
-“WTF IS THAT?!”
-“BURN THAT TOO!”
-“EWWWW NOOO!”
-“WTF”
-“WWTTTTFFFF”
-“JESUS FUCKING CHRIST”
-“BURN EVERYTHING”
-“RUUUUUUUN”

Honest to God I would have had a heart attack myself if I was there when this was going down. Or I would have noped right out into the cold, unforgiving void of the Antarctic darkness.

This movie is fucking nuts.


Azzam


The Thing is the best Carpenter film. I say this as a massive fan of what he does in all of his work good or bad but The Thing is a misunderstood director making his magnum opus. A film that has aged beautifully and takes aliens away from what the route they had hardened for decades, from creatures that can be imagined and physical to a thing of nightmares. It’s Lovecraft by way of the modern world, it’s admirable and his choice to just focus on directing instead of being the firebrand of auteur that he was stands out, a man who had added heavy synths and guitar leads let’s the film breathe in a way he hasn’t since Halloween. I could wake poetic about this film all day but few films get the blue collar scientist forced to fight off something beyond their comprehension as well as this. Alien comes in a close second.




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